Tuesday, April 04, 2006

A leap of faith..

So a once upon a time I had this friend. She was my best friend we did everything together. We were inseparable for about 6 years. So much so she was an identical twin and I felt closer to her that her twin ever could (not the case of coarse cause they shared the womb but you know what I mean)

Anyways the last 3 nights in a row I have been dreaming about her. Nothing bad, mostly about her in happy times, about her family, about her wedding (I have no idea if she's married) about her having kids.

Anyways, when I got to work I googled her.
I was amazed (actually not really because I knew she would do big things) but she's a lawyer for a huge firm.
We have not talked in about 7 years, the last time we spoke was a conversation I had with her about her "boyfriend" and the fact that I did not approve.

Anyways we had a falling out about him.
She moved away and we have not spoken since.
These dreams had dug up a bunch of old feelings.
Seeing her picture at the Firm almost brought tears to my eyes.
I hope she's happy.
Anyways I took a leap of faith.
I emailed her.
I apologized of coarse not bringing up the past just that I wanted to move forward.
I left it in her court. Its funny cause even though we have not talked in forever she had given me a gift for my 16th birthday that I still have, 12 years later. Its sitting on my bookshelf. Its a cute ceramic teddy bear picnic thing that says

"The happiest times are those spent with friends"

I hope we can reconnect.
Its hard sometimes to say you were wrong, and for that I am really sorry. She is one of the strongest people I know and somehow I feel like my heart is telling me I need her.
I do.


Krystal said...

I hope things work out.

Somebody's son said...

Men just fuck things up. All of my girlfriend's friends hate me. I laugh. Deep down men don't care whether any of their significant other's friends like them. I know I don't. Besides, every girl has that fat fucking friend that's unhappy with herself so she just sees the need to fuck up everyone else's life...I wish I could suffocate all fat women. There. I'm done.

Anne said...

I think you did the right thing. Obviously there is some reason that you are thinking about her..and this maybe just what she (or you) need right now.

I bet this will mean a lot to her too.

coffeygirlb said...

That's wonderful. I have an identical scenario that has presently been playing out in my life. Except she found me, we grew up together, I knew where she was, still in our hometown, but we'd just stopped talking. After high school, I guess things got weird for one reason or another. Anyway we've reconnected and it's just like we never stopped being friends, I hate that we lost so many years but it's all turned out ok! I hope yours does too.

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