So while in bed tonight I try to sleep, after 1 hour I realize that my back is way too messed up tonight to just be able to go to bed without drugs. So I took some. 2 hours goes by, I am still wide awake and my mind is in overdrive, 3 hours go by and its time for some more drugs. I think I took the wrong ones, that or my body just does not like them the way I used to. Last time I remember taking this drug I remember I was drooling at the effects of it and could barley hold my head up after 20 minutes. I so wish it would have to same effect so I can sleep. The pain is gone but my mind is racing. I am starting to write this at 3:30 am some of you are probably getting ready for work (it's 6:30am on the east coast)
hum what to write?
We had a talk tonight about Norm. Yeah Norm.
See I'll start from the beginning (yeah this will be a long post)
Picture me 17 years old (seems like a 100 years ago) he was 2 years older than me, we met through mutual friends at Boomerang (oh my goodness did I just write that) True story though we met had a worldwind romance and dated for some time. Well after about a year my mom said she was moving to Toronto for a job (she never did) so Norm and I started talking about moving in together ( I swore we would have been married).
So we took the plunge and moved in. See there was a little problem though we lived together and worked together (big mistake) its seems the minute we started to live together things started to change/fall apart. After the "honeymoon" we started to bicker all the time and things changed.
He broke my heart. But because I was so hurt at the time I did something really stupid. Something that to this day I regret. Not only because it was stupid but because I can only imagine how much it hurt. Anyways we broke up and we still had the condo so until we could figure out living arrangements and get rid of the Condo things we a little weird he stayed with his family while I figured out what I was going to do. Well one day he called to say he would be by to pick up some things.
(ok remember I was 18 and just had my heart broken) So on the day he was coming by I invited a male companion to my house. It also just so happens that when he got there we were in bed. Yeah stupid I know. NOTHING HAPPENED but I let him believe different. It was my way I was thinking to get back at him.
Stupid. Anyways needless to say we did not speak for years after that. And I have apologized a million times for my mistake, I still wonder if he believes me or not.
Well we ran into each other after about 2 years and started to talk again. I am really glad we are friends, and I truly value his friendship, I think its amazing that after being through what we went through that 10 years later and after a lot of growing we still have a good relationship. It's weird how things work out some times.
The conversation I had with C was that Norm will always have a piece of my heart, you can not spend that much time and grow that much with someone without giving a little bit of yourself and holding a piece of them always in your heart.
I think every relationship no matter how good/bad is a reflection of yourself. A reflection of where you have been and how you have grown.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment