Tuesday, January 10, 2006

All about my sex life

I did a little thinking yesterday and decided I will spill all my sex history in my blog. I feel a little naughty doing it but I really do not care.
If you do not like it do not read it. This is my blog and I can write what I want
STOP READING THIS NOW IF YOU REALLY DO NOT WANT TO HEAR THIS.
I promise not to make it too graphic but it will be VERY honest.
So I guess the only way to do this is start from the beginning.
The first boy I ever loved and I thought I was going to marry was Rock Picknel I was 14 and he was the boy for me. He was such a hottie. See how I met him was fun. His dad and my dad bought a business together a restaurant and we used to wash dishes together. Romantic I know, we were young, he was the first boy I kissed and I swear it was love, he was the first boy that I cried over, and when I say cry I sobbed. I told my mom that I wanted to die if he did not love me. My mother so coyly laughed out loud and told me " There will be a million more heartbreaks in your life before you get married, each of these heartbreaks will teach you a lesson"
Wow if I knew then what I know now. So I had all through elementary school had a crush on a boy named Corey. He was the first boy who actually took me on a date. Actually not even really a date more to a school function. He took me to the end of the year formal. I remember wearing his jacket in the school yard thinking about how cool it was and how all the other girls must have been jealous of me, all summer we used to get sneak out to talk. Nothing ever happened we never even kissed, I wanted him to kiss me but he never did. I wonder why?.
So then I went to High School, everyone was having sex in High School. Everyone except for me. Its weird my mother was always worried I would end up pregnant by the time I was 15. She never wanted me to go down the path she did (My oldest brother Frankie was conceived when my mom was 15, I still can not imagine the strength it would have taken to have a child when you are still a child yourself, those were for sure different times)
So I was the only one not having sex I dated a few boys here and there, and then I dated a jock, his name was Cole Fieldstein we dated for a few months things got really serious ( I had moved out by this time) we used to make out in his basement all the time and dry hump ( I can not believe I just wrote that) but his sister was always there and I was scared to death of her she was really scary and was always checking up on us, so we never "really" fooled around, not for the lack of trying though if it was up to him we would have had sex everyday. Then one day he asked me to skip class and no one was home. IT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN, I was sure of it he was going to feel my boobies under my shirt. I was a bit of a square and all the pressure of everyone around me having sex I chickened out.. Then he cheated on my with a girl named Shannon she got naked with him the first time she met him. ( I think its funny how I remember things like her name) I stood my ground and like the 15 year old I was I told anyone who would listen that "he has performance issues and has no idea how to please a women" I had no idea what this meant I think I saw it in a movie, but because we were all so inexperienced with sex at this age and "what women really want" it went over well. Years later I ran into him at the mall. He was married and had 2 kids already.
So we move on. Jen and I both got permission to go to SUPER EX without supervision, this was the thing to do when you were 15 years old. Her dad dropped us off and we stayed all day. We found some interesting boys that we thought we cute so we followed them around. Then we talked to them. They were older than us by 2 years, but we both thought they were cute. Jen told her dad she was at my house and we walked home with them. Jean-Marc was the one Jen liked, I had a crush on Jonathan. Jean-Marc was old enough to drive so he drove us home, or his mom did I can not remember really but we both got phone numbers and felt so accomplished from meeting older boys. Jen and Jean-Marc started dating and me and Jonathan started dating. It turned out Jonathan and I were both Virgins. This was Ok with me because we both had little to no experience with the whole sex situation. From what I remember Jen and Jean-Marc immediately had sex so I was again left with the situation that I was the only one not having sex. Because we both had no idea what to expect we only explored each other for about the first year (yes I was still a square) we fooled around and saw each other naked. Jonathan was a lot of firsts for me. It was fun to explore each other in the fumbling way 2 virgins would. It was when I was dating him and we had a hot session of fingers and feeling that I actually explored myself. I discovered masturbation. I never told him about it but with all the emotions and feelings I was having I needed to explore this option. It felt dirty but good at the same time. We watched a porn together one time and this was the first time someone went down on me. At first I was scared (maybe it was his braces) it took about 10 tries to get it right, I almost never let him ever do it again after the first time because it was so frustrating for me and scary and the fact that I had no idea what to expect, funny thing was that right before I would orgasm I would make him stop because I was insure of what I was feeling. WHAT WAS I THINKING!!
Our first time was a fumbling mess. It was around Christmas and we were at my moms I had bought him glow in the dark boxers and I had a lock on my door so we decided it was time. We had just had a heavy petting session and we were both ready it had been over a year of heavy petting and fooling around that things sort of just progressed. We had bought condoms months earlier just in case the need arouse and we had talked having sex to death. When should we do it, how should it be? No lights and lots of candles.
After trying 3 condoms because we thought it would be so good the first time to do it in the dark with candles so it was romantic we could not see anything, I think it was on upside down the first time and then we tried another, I was too scared to touch the dam thing and then it broke. It was up to me to get the condom on and well lets just say he got a little excited and well it never happened.
A few days later we finally did it, to be honest I was a little disappointed, I was waiting for the earth to move and it never did. We got better over time but nothing really earth shattering. We dated for almost 2 years and then I broke up with him. He was a nice guy but it was too much. He stalked me for about 4 months, it was bad really he got arrested 2 times while stalking me it was so scary. My mom said he was the kind of guy who would shot me if I dated anyone else. This was the same time that lady was killed on her front lawn with a bow and arrow from he estranged boyfriend.
I digress.
Oh and then came the fake Id and Boomerang. Jen and Jean-Marc were still dating so I was hanging around with them a lot. My mom helped us laminate our fake student its so we could go to Hull. I met Norm through Jen and Jean-Marc.
The first time I saw him I had a crush. He was very good looking and of coarse he was older than me. He was fun, one of the first memories I have of him was slow dancing at Boomerang. He was the type of guy who held you tight while you danced. I was smitten. The thing that really made me fall for him was Jen and I thought we would be so cool and get up and dance in the cage that was extended from the top of the stage at the bar, well when we were done we came down and Jean-Marc was furious with her. Asking why she wanted all the men looking at her "acting like a slut" Then he hit her, Norm lundged at him and nailed him in the jaw. He fell to the ground BIG MAC who was one of the door men (we were friends with most of the doormen) came over and grabbed Norm and was dragging him out, I stopped him and instead he grabbed Jean-Marc and took him to a back room. I had only heard what happened "In the back room" and I was scared to death about it. We never saw Jean-Marc again that night. Jenny still dated him for awhile. Me and Norm started to date
Things were good at first we had a lot of fun together, he was also a lot of firsts for me. The first person I truly feel in love with, the first person I lived with, the first man to take me on a vacation. The sex was different because I really cared about him, he was gentle and very patient with me. It's weird for me all these years later thinking about sex with exec is strange. To be totally honest I think I had way too much caught up in the emotions of our relationship then in our sex life. I know we had sex and when we first started dating we had it often but nothing really sticks out in my head. He never put too much pressure on the situation of sex, we were in a really serious relationship. When we started to live and work together things changed. The sex stopped. We even went on vacation and if I remember correctly we had sex 1 time in a week. And it was an open bar vacation spot (things were falling apart by this time anyways) But 2 young people on vacation together who are supposed to be madly in love and no sex? It was too much for both of us. Neither of us knew how to handle the situation. (see previous post)
I was not single for very long. Lug and I started to date as soon as I moved out of the house that Norm and I shared. I was scared of getting involved again and Lug and I never had sex. He told everyone we did, it never happened. It never happened because I was sleeping with his best friend Carlos, we kept it a secret. Crazy I know, I was attracted to both of them but Carlos was more aggressive and that was a big turn on for me. He was also seemed very experienced to me and it was all new to me. He was not a big guy per say but he certainly made up for that in bed. We never really dated and it was a mutual agreement with both of us. It was always safe. Years later I introduced him to my roommate and last that I knew they were still dating. That was years ago (the roommate and Carlos)
I dated a few more interesting people along the way, I met this guy named Andrew he was fun he was a big guy and no I do not mean cock he was about 6'3 250 pounds he was funny and we always had a blast together. He broke up with me cause I had issues, lots of them but that's another story.
I met Dom at a keg party, actually the keg party was at his house, I had way too much to drink and ended up in bed with him. No sex we just shared the same bed, I thought he was a gentleman, we dated for a bit after that. Nothing really to report about that. We had sex a few I had completely forgot about him but my mom reminded me. He was a mamma's boy in a bad way and hockey was more important to him than I ever could be.
Jimmy (I laugh as I write that) he had penis problems, I feel bad writing that but he did, we met through friends and would have had sex had he not had issues with his penis. He could not get it up. It was weird for me because I had not ever come across that or even heard about it, I thought it was me at first I got over it. I was upset at first he could not get it hard. He could cum with a blow job but it was still too soft to ever have sex, I was patient at first, he even bought be a dildo as if that would make it better. I had needs I was in my sexual prime I broke up with him it was the second time I saw a boy cry ( Jonathan was the first and he cried a lot). He was a nice guy and I ran into him years later. I told him I was getting married and he said that he was too. Aparentley his penis works for other people and just did not like me. I felt bad and shallow yeah it probably was not fair to dump him because his cock did not work but it gave me a complex, I always felt like it was my fault. I have never had penis issues with anyone else so I know it was not me. It took me awhile to convoke me of that.
So now I am 19 and perusing the bars. I had found this one guy I thought was hot one night and I was going to have him. I had drank way too much that night and so did Kristie I opted to bring this boy home and she was not happy about it. We all got into a cab together and she made sure she sat in the middle of us, I have no idea what his name was, Kristie reached over me to puke out the door in the cab, in the process she smacked my face and it started to bleed, the boy was not deterred, I was bleeding and covered in Kristies puke and he was still up for the romp. Any boy that desperate was not worth my time. I sent him home in a cab.
I ran into someone in a bar one night that I had always wanted. He dated one of my best friends all through high school, we spent a lot of time together in high school because he was dating my best friend, he was sexy as hell, hot body and he was a life guard uummm. We bumped into each other and we were both single we were both horny and we started to talk about what sex would be like if we ever had it. We drank a few never touching each other not even sitting closer to each other. The sexual tension was INSANE!. I whispered in his ear that he was coming home with me and walked to the coat check to get my jacket. It was mad sex. Some of the best I had ever had. If was so animal (safe of coarse) we never even touched till we were behind closed doors. The noises that must have come from that room. We broke the bed. He was my only one night stand. It was amazing and I have no regrets. I still get goose bumps talking about it....
Jonathan and I ran into each other a few times in the bar. We had sex again and it was fun. We both had more experience and it was different. Casual sex with a friend that you never really had to worry about( safe of coarse) If I remember correctly Phil watched us one of the times. It was interesting. Its still something I think is really hot. Watching or being watched?
Maybe that's why I love porn. Ask anyone I have a great collection. I have not added to it in a few years. (hum that gives me an idea) But I have always enjoyed it.
mostly girl on girl, I find it very sensual, I love the way a women's body looks naked, I think women are beautiful ( that will be another post), heteral sexual porn is ok too but to get me really hot its gotta be girl on girl, actually any porn will do it for me.
One of the best moments I remember was actually seeing girl on girl action live. It was drunk and scandalous and they were both super hot ladies. It was so free and both parties equally enjoyed themselves. It was hot to watch, its even hot to write about all these years later. It was very in the moment and spontaneous.
I think that is when sex is best. Hot and in the moment. Some of the best sex memories I have are about when sex never happened. It should have but some how got lost in translation. There was one time in a bathroom at a bar, it was very carnal and was a hot "almost" sex moment. One other time I remember and I think she will too as I just wrote about watching her was a time when we were both naked in my bed getting a massage. I wonder what sex would have been like with her, sometimes I still do. So after all this craziness
I went almost a year and a half without sex. I dated a few people Tom ( What was I thinking?) My boobs ended up on the internet. They are probably still there. See Tom was a photographer and I let him do nudes. Only a few people have seen them, when I dumped him cause he was in love with me and wanted to have sex ( did I mention he weighed 300 pounds) We went our separate ways. I am sure my nudes are posted somewhere. He still to this day will not talk to me. Lol
So no sex
Crazy now that I think about it. It was a choice I made for myself. Yes sex was fun but I found there was so much pressure put on it and it was really no big deal. I went 19 months don't get me wrong again everyone around me was having sex ( I got to watch/hear some of this (come back in 5 minutes))I was living vicariously through them. And then it happened I fell and I fell hard
Sal introduced us. She talked him up on the way to the hotel to pick the "boys" up to head out to the bar. He had just cut himself shaving and was joking around about it. He had me laughing like crazy and I was hot for him. A girl had called the hotel looking for him because she was going to met him at the bar. I told him to tell her I was his girlfriend and last weekend was a mistake. ( Did I mention I was straddling him on a chair at this point about 10 minutes after meeting him) I still remember what I was wearing that night. Funny how things work out. So Adam went on to tell him that I had gone 1 1/2 years without sex and then began the game. He wanted to say he was the "first" we started to date a little bit after this. I fell hard for him but for some reason I made him wait. And I am not talking 2-3 dates I made him wait 5 months! He got a lot of play and there was a tonne of sexual tension between us. I still do not know why I made him wait. I think its weird to this day. He was a nice guy but we both had our issues. 2 people stubborn as hell unsure of where this relationship is going.
It was worth the wait. The first time we had sex was in a bunk bed in the barracks. It was time and everyone in the building knew about it. Right after he got up and went out to the hall to get his high fives from the 30 people waiting at the door. The next time was a lot more tender. It was the first time I had a orgasm during sex and we climaxed together, the first few times we had sex it was really emotional for me and sometimes when we had to be away from each other for long periods of time I would cry after sex. He took away all my worries. One example I have of that was I (like all women) worry about what men think when we are naked (stupid I know) But one time after sex I grabbed all the blankets when he got up to hide my body. He took one look at me and realized what I had just done and took all the blankets. He made me lay there naked as the day I was born and told me I was stupid. He loves my body and we have a hot sex life. I love that he knows how to push my buttons and I know how to push his.
If I had known that I would have never made him wait. He was the first guy I could really let myself go with. He was the only person I could ask for what I wanted in bed and he happily obliged. I still cry sometimes after sex. It may sound strange but sometimes I feel so in touch with my body when its next to his it feels like my soul has met its equal. We have fun with sex I find it hard not to. We have some funny things that have happened to us while having sex. Earlier I mention I had a roommate for some time, well one night we all went out (to Atomic) and we came back in the wee hours of the morning and had loud, mirror shattering sex. It started in the bedroom then into the hallway ( I had left my roommate at the bar so we were alone) against the wall in the hallway, on to the shower, on the side of the bathtub (ripped the shower curtain clear off the shower) on the bathroom floor, back into the hallway dripping wet from the shower and no towels on the floor in the hallway then passing out in bed.
We awoke the next morning to my roommates parents (who had spent the night in the living room) We both snuck out as quickly as we could. And you know there was no way they were not awake for the whole deal. The neightbours knocked on the wall you know her parents heard everything!!!
We have broken a few couches in our time, including the one we now own. I have permanent scars on my body from some mishaps with the "Ash can"
He told me that if I was writing about sex I had to be honest. I have nothing to lie about,nor would I care to lie. I do not care what people think or what opions they may have. I think there may be someone that I forgot somewhere but at this time I can not remember my mind has chosen to omit it. If I think of more at a later date I will make sure to update. Some people think sex before marriage is taboo, I think each encounter has made me a better lover. And Vice Versa. If I had not had the experiences I have had in my life I would not know how to please my man. I would have never learned how to give lets see how he puts it give a " Toe Curling" blow job. I would not know my own body and how it works and what I like. ( I keep adding to that list) I will not give you too many details because those are all for us. I think sex is great when love is involved. I also think its great even if your not in love.
Sex is sex, take it for what it is. Enjoy yourself. Do not take life to serious. (unless your my baby sister reading this and none of that applies) Just kidding.

2 comments:

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Anonymous said...

how about traumatizing your baby cousin.....my virging eyes...ahhh

 
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