Monday, August 07, 2006

I love my job

What a fun Day.

1. Work eagerly at you desk and look busy. It's important to not chat because if you do it looks like you have no work to do, listen actively to the conversation around you however only "chime" in if asked and make sure you have them ask 2 times to make it look like you are busy.

2. When someone asks you something. Hold up your band and say "Oh can you give me just one minute" and finish reading whatever you were reading (CNN, Blogs, personal email) and then after making them wait for at least 2 minutes ask what you can help them with.

3. Every once in a while sigh loudly under your breath and pick up a stack of papers (does not matter what) and walk outta the room and stop at the bathroom to check your makeup and hair. Maybe take a swing by the vending machine too.

4. Sort out the paperwork on your desk, pretend to look things up in the system and doodle some notes on the post its on your desk for authenticity.

5. Walk to the fax machine and take a look at what's arrived. Sort through it and take only what's yours. Do not distribute faxes look "too busy" to sort it all out.

6. Walk to the back of the warehouse because you have nothing better to do.

7. File your paperwork VERY slowly. This is important to avoid having anyone ask you for help.

8. Sigh loudly anytime someone drops something on your desk.

9. Don't look up when people walk into the room. Wait a few minutes and then if they ask you something make them ask again before you acknowledge them.

10. Work on this blog posting while type feverishly at your keyboard like you are doing something productive.

1 comment:

Mr. Husbland said...

This sounds like hell. I've had a job like this before and I swear a day lasted 30 hours instead of 24 while I worked there.

 
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